Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Day 2 - No Social Networking

So I haven't talked to anyone for two days and I feel really good about myself. I wrote about 4 songs last night and slept at 4:00 A.M.

This morning I wrote one more, so I guess in total I have about 5 now in one day. Now, they aren't superb, I still haven't found the guitar sound for any of them.

I have them hummed recorded as the melody, I just need to get back at practicing guitar and posting them up online.

Not sure if I'll go toward soundcloud or Youtube, possibly both. I wish I had my own guitar though. Anyways, I'm actual feeling a lot positive of this change. I'm getting things together, at least I'm doing well because I feel happy.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Major Earthquake expected to hit in the Southern Hemisphere

Yes Man - Personal Thoughts

I watched this last night and it really does give me strength. I always lay back on opportunities that can be a good change for my life.

The character of Carl refuse to accept any plans that may rise and is living a very dull life making excuses. (Sorta like me.)

Attending a “Yes Man” seminar, he is convinced his life can get better by saying, “Yes” In series of events, it went from bad to good and back to bad. He has no personal control on situations, and believes he has to say yes to everything.

If you feel it’s right, and you want to do it, and you believe it’ll do you good, then say yes. If you feel it’s out of your strength than say no.

I’m a type of person to say I feel lonely and wish I could go out, but say no whenever somebody asks me to hang out. I have no idea why I do it, maybe because their definition of fun is different from mine.

They like parties, drinking, eating, whereas I hate being involved in those places. I much rather go for a walk and sit at a bench to admire the day. Not many people do it, well, they do, but they’re all seniors. They wait until their dying days to see the beauty of life, I want to capture it early on and die knowing I admired the small things in life.

Carl got lucky and met Alison who falls in love with him, she see’s he’s the brighter man in life, and being spontaneous makes a person so much better. You don’t know what to expect from them, and I believe that’s how life should be lived. Plans never go as planned, so do whatever your heart tells you, walk wherever your feet take you. If the mall is closed, if you’ve been denied a job, just keep walking. One thing I want to do with my life is get lost. Just be somewhere I’ve never been before like a tourist, and in order to find my way back, ask strangers.

I’ll bring a cell phone in case if things don’t go out as planned.

There are bumps to saying yes to everything. Carl ends up in a situation where he's accused of being a terrorist. Not all of us are going to be called terrorists if we say yes to everything, but we will find us in a situation that'll become difficult to grasp and you'll find out saying yes doesn't always bring good luck.

This has been the 8th time I've seen this film, and it's like how one person uses the bible to get through a day.  Yes Man is the motivation people need and it really brought me to my problems and how I can improve on them.

No Social Networking until March 1, 2012

To make this short, I’m not going to access my Tumblr, Twitter or Facebook account until March 1.


I have a lot I don’t do in a day and becoming a computer bound creature has really eaten away most of my life. Like I said to myself yesterday, I’m not going to wait until January 1 to make resolutions, Why do you have to wait so long just to make a change. I’m going to begin today. Tomorrow is too far away, however, the weather is not cooperating with me, this is not an excuse for me not to go for a walk. I made other plans if the weather isn’t going to cooperate.

Thank god for books.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Last Day of Summer - Personal Thoughts

The character of Joe is somebody I can incredibly relate too at some degree. He’s the dark part of my mind and the me I expose to everyone on a daily basis.

His fantasy of shooting up the place where he works is a thought that has past my mind at some point in my life.

A lot of people who watched this probably didn’t understand the part why he took it so seriously when Stefanie, the customer, gave him a glance. With some guys, nobody bothers to look at them simply because they don’t see it as a pleasant sight. Like they say though, little things always makes somebody’s day.

Someone offers me a band-aid when I get a cut, I’ll never forget that about them because it’s a random act of kindness. I don’t see many people treating me like human, I usually have a creep presense with most females.

His plan takes a turn from a single glance of a girl and he ends up getting a situation he never prepared for.

He becomes friends with the hostage who turns out to be a former student at the same high school as the one he attended. His story of him jerking in the study hall has made him famous according to Stefanie, but Joe disgusts that memories and throws a fit.

Joes a kid with complications, he knows the world very well, he has large dreams, but none of which that’ll take action.

I believe a lot of people in DJ Qualls life have questioned his figure and judged him for it when he’s really suffered from Hodgkin’s lymphoma. As Joe, Qualls did a very good job portraying the character because I feel he really revealed an actual part of himself.

I really enjoyed how Joe becomes a stronger character and his enemies fall weak, aka his boss. He became paranoid after discovering Joe’s gun bullets on the bathroom floor but failed to convince police officers it was Joes. The weakness of Joe caught onto his boss and in the end, he’s the pussy.

IMDB gave it 5/10 I guess because there were some misunderstanding in the story, Possible thoughts like it may encourage people to do the same. Whatever happened to the CNN tape he sent in the mailbox? Did Stefanie tell the truth when telling her stories? I guess the viewer can create those parts.

I really wished I’d have watched it during the actual last day of summer. The days in the movie look really serene.

Friday, December 23, 2011

50/50 - Personal Review, Tiny Spoilers, and Extras

I managed to get around on watching 50/50 two days ago, and in my opinion, it’s number 1 on the movies that stick to the heart. I laughed, and I cried, and it brought out a lot in reality than just plain Hollywood lines.

A scene such as when the doctor informs Adam he has a tumour on his spine. The doctor seems more focused on his job than comforting him. He suggests seeing a therapist, but because he is a doctor, he just tells what has to be known.

I’m glad they didn’t make that scene a dramatic one, where the doctor gets equally stressed as the patient.

50/50 was the type of movie where in the end, you look differently at yourself in the mirror. You bring out the best of yourself, rather than pouting on flaws. It showed me how fortunate I am and how life is fragile. Adam never expected to get cancer when he lead such a healthy lifestyle, what were the odds of it being a rare form of cancer.

The movie is inspired by true events and I am glad the movie was shot in a more solid structure, rather than making it all dramatic with music and what not.

Adam’s girlfriend, Rachael likes to believe she is capable of taking care of Adam, when deep down she knows she can’t. She wants to be strong, but at the same time she is stuck with a situation she never prepared for in her entire life. Cheating wasn’t the best thing to do at a time like that. That was a dick move.

Kyle is Adam’s enthusiastic friend. He lives his life aimlessly and does real well at putting peoples mind at ease. The last thing he wants is to be surrounded by problems.

I do wonder how Kyle and Adam became friends in real life; having two different personalities and being so close, there must be another story to how that came to be.

Something things I found out afterwards of the film is Seth Rogen’s wife (Lauren Miller) was an actor in the movie. She was the one walking the dog past Kyle and Adam.

“Sugar” from YTV’s “The Zone” was also an actor (Sugar Lyn Beared). She was at the get well soon/farewell party. I remember watching her growing up as a kid, and she still looks the same, her hair has grown though.

Also, Claire, the librarian (Laura Bertram). She was also in another of my childhood favourite show called, “Ready or Not” which aired on YTV.

Lani Billard and Laura Bertman both were actors on the television series "Ready or Not" which aired between  1993-1997
She’s really grown from the last I remember, I secretly had a crush on her from that show.

Overall, the film is a good watch. It changes your minds, and movies that can do that are really powerful. So if you haven’t seen it, be sure to watch it!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Inside Job and Corporations

so i just saw this movie called "Inside Job".

I know, I know, it's just a movie, but still, it changed my fucking view on everything.

I mean here we are in front of our computers, complaining about women and society while there are corporations out there growing stronger and mightier than the government itself.

We are basically living in a time where democracy has failed because people with more money than you can ever imagine are basically shaping the law according to their own needs.

Too long, Didn't read?

Rich old men are ruling the world, and you get to suffer for their mistakes. wow big surprise amirite

Protesting outside their offices is a method that obviously doesn't work, so what the hell do you do?

Short Attention Span

Does anyone else here feel like you're detached from reality? It feels like I can't even remember what I've read whenever I'm reading books or an Internet post, for example, I have to save a web page and look back at it even if I find it interesting enough, I wont remember what I've read, nor can I remember conversations. Does anyone else have this problem? I tend to space out a lot so that could be a reason for my awful memory

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Chapter 1: The Eve of the War (The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells)

Ogilvy is an astronomer the narrator knows well and recently they e discovered beams of smoke coming from mars. Apparently they are missiles by advanced human species which many astronomers refuse to believe such notion. The narrator takes a walk with his wife and they both see a tranquil scene in the sky.

Humans nowadays believe there are other life forms on this universe platform, and I can understand how anyone in the past would consider it to be far fetched.

I don't think they mean harm, it could be something not from mars. It could be humans from earth trying to wipe out the population to be in control. Mars could just be a false shield to make people believe it's martians.

The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells (Page 1-10) vocabulary

Scrutinized - Examine closely
Transient - Lasting only a short time; existing briefly; temporary.
Complacency - A feeling of quiet pleasure or security, often while unaware of some potential danger, defect, or the like; self-satisfaction or smug satisfaction with an existing situation, condition, etc.
Fro - Obsolete . from; back. Alternating from once place to another. (To and fro)
Serene - Calm, peaceful, or tranquil; unruffled
Infusoria - Any of various microscopic organisms found in infusions of decaying organic matter.
Improbable - Unlikely to be true or to happen.
Enterprise - "A project undertaken or to be undertaken, especially one that is important or difficult or that requires boldness or energy. To keep the peace is a difficult enterprise."
Intellects - A particular mind or intelligence, especially of a high order.
Disillusionment - To free from or deprive of illusion,  belief, idealism, etc.; disenchant.
Secular - of or pertaining to worldly things or to things that are not regarded as religious, spiritual, or sacred; temporal: secular interests.
Equatorial - of, pertaining to, or near an equator,  especially the equator  of the earth.
Attenuated - To weaken or reduce in force, intensity, effect, quantity, or value: to attenuate desire.
Inundate - To overwhelm: inundated with letters of protest.
Eloquent - Movingly expressive.
Incessant - Continuing without interruption; ceaseless; unending: an incessant noise.
Wrought - Archaic except in some senses . a simple past tense and past participle of work.
Apostles - Any of the early followers of Jesus who carried the Christian message into the world.
Warred - a conflict carried on by force of arms, As between nations or between parties within a nation; warfare, as by land, sea, or air.
Subtlety - "Delicacy or nicety of character or meaning."
Fluctuating - To change continually; shift back and forth; vary irregularly: The price of gold fluctuated wildly last month.
Incandescent - Bright, Brilliant
Scrutiny - A close and searching look.
Vigil - A watch or a period of watchful attention maintained at night or at other times: The nurse kept her vigil at the bedside of the dying man.
Feeble - Physically weak, as from age or sickness; frail.
Oblong - In the form of a rectangle one of whose dimensions is greater than the other.
Profundity - The quality or state of being profound;
Audible - Loud enough to be heard.
Quivered - To shake with a slight but rapid motion.
Vacancy - An empty spot.
Unfathomable - Undetermined
Unerring - Accurate throughout, no error or flaw.
Scoffed - To make fun of
Jubilant - Showing great joy, satisfaction
Zenith ward - Highest point in a division
Excursionist - Tourist

Sunday, December 4, 2011

My Weekend

My weekend was pretty dull like always, although I really did have plans for today and yesterday.

I’ve been telling myself to get up and get volunteer hours done. I might as well resort to community service from a crime, though, It wouldn’t be good on my resume.

My plan was to wake up Saturday morning and go to the store and give my volunteer sheet and my resume. I ended up staying awake til 4 and waking up at 1 in the afternoon.

Major fail, however, I did get some homework done.

Today I woke up early, however when I called they told me I’d have to wait til Tuesday or Monday in the morning which blows because I have school though I am willing to miss the first class.

I really need a job, I’m sick and tired of sitting here all day… getting sick and stuff.

Immortality and Misfits

Whenever I watch Misfits, I sometimes really wish I was given a power. With Nathan gone, I might say yes to immortality. There’s good sides and bad sides to it. I’d have to see my friends and family die, but at the same time I can provide the newer generation with words of wisdom allowing minds to soar further and faster than anyone could imagine. Then again, I’m okay with telepathy, reading peoples minds and talking to them that way. I don’t own a cellphone, nor do I have the cash to pay the bills. It could be a fun time messing with peoples minds, but I would never use it for bad. I’d use it for complex situations.

Saturday, December 3, 2011


The education board at my high school have decided to take a dick move by releasing report cards for graduation students.

I have procrastinated for a long time and I have about 72 hours to complete a pile of homework due in November.

Everything from English to Psychology, but I really don’t feel like doing anything.

Then again, do I ever?

Theory of Mind Destruction

In Psychology class, my friend next to me brought up a theory how a single blink of an eye can alter our universe completely, or maybe we enter another universe with an unnoticeable change.

For example, a kid in front of me has hair on his head, I blinked, and one strand is missing, I wouldn’t know, but it happened. Or maybe something has changed halfway across the world, someone is gone, or something a long those lines…

Another could be the president of America is somebody else, that’d be a noticeable way in terms of changed universe.

I asked him if there could be any way to correct that, maybe blink more to come back.

But what if you blink to much, or sneeze to the point you’re back to your mothers womb?

9 months, damn.

Video Class Was Productive

In Video Production class our group for a school video was completed. It was nifty plan created by my friend and it was easy to work with.

During recording, she walked passed me, came out of nowhere behind me too.

My friend gave a gesture at me because he knew and I was like, “Who the fuck is she?” when I know who she is.

Not even a hello.

Progress in Programming

In Programming class I had to continue working on a custom project in Visual Basic. I didn’t do much yesterday, so It was really important I did something today.

Just to keep myself occupied, I began watching tutorials. “How to make a download manager” seemed a bit complicated, All I had to do was remember the way it was shown to do.

I managed to get it all down, except for one error in the download button. I believe it wasn’t compatible with the computer model, oh well, saved and at least I tried.

I’m sorta keeping in mind to doing a devious trick, possibly a little tickle to the network computers.

Dead Day in English

English class came first and it was quite boring. Teacher spoke briefly about the pep rally and how he did feel a little humiliated when they tricked him to beliving the shot was in. He’d missed from a long shot being blindfolded.

He said he had realized the shot was a complete miss because he found himself in an odd angle after the shot. He played a long to avoid ruining a good moment.

The rest of the class he just old us to work on late assignments.

For once since September I used my agenda to write out the things I have to do. I have quite a lot, and my plan was to begin today, but I’ll begin tomorrow because I get distracted way to easily.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Drama Class Today

In drama class today a girl began crying. Now it all began when my friend told a girl she was sweating and her sweat marks were showing.

I was paying attention to the teacher, but I had heard the conversation with my other ear and I realized immediately something bad was going to happen.

Girls are over sensitive, and self-conscious, well, majority of them. I asked her if she is self-conscious, and she said yes. Then came the water works, I told my friend she’s self-conscious and she gave her a hug and apologized.

I like my friend for feeling sorry rather than just starring, and they hugged for a while until the girl was okay.

At the end of the day I gave her a hug because girls really feel bad having that comment in front of the opposite gender. Girls like to be comforted and admired. I hope she left on a good note.

My drama teacher also showed me my costume which I loved, really sparkly. She also mentioned I’m on the same league as the top acting students in previous years. “I’m their league” and I knew those boys, all the girls loved him. I envied him, but to know we’re on the same league, I feel happy.

I came home stronger and confident than ever. It felt good, and that load of hating drama is gone. My work matters.

Oh You Think You're So Special

The Pep or Prep Rally was decent. It had a lot of dancing, a lot of bad script reading. The girl cracked a few jokes that nobody laughed too. It was killing me to see the people up their killing themselves.

It’s funny, we saw people who display themselves a lot in high school, at one point, somebody yelled out, “The Choir SUCKS!” It was sad to see some groups given little attention.

Today was an excuse for the popular kids to expose themselves more than usual. Yes, go on and dress up in fancy clothing and say no word. Stand with the boy who everybody loves because he’s funny. I honestly expected a lot from everyone.

These kids are judgemental, we all are, but them being on a higher level. They can point to weirdos, losers, creeps, and the normal people which they do so by pointing into mirrors.

If I was 14 years old, I’d flip out more than usual. I just laugh at them at how ridiculous they seem.

They’re definition of normal is being somebody they’re not. In a small town like this one, these boys and girls will do anything to feel famous.

Kids, they do the darnest things.

Technology Killed the Teenager

Psychology class was fun. We’ve begun watching “Rain Man” starring Tom Cruise. It has something to do with our unit which is good.

The kid with autism seems to have a really good memory which is mind-blowing. Being given a telephone book and remembering them all.

Half of the class was missing, the people I adore having around were downstairs presenting themselves to an audience and preparing to perform for us.

The girl next to me has been quiet since her arrival to our school. I’ve been meaning to make some small talk, because I really don’t want her feeling alone during graduation. Like, come on, new girl comes to a new school in her final year, my guess is some personal reason, and she doesn’t know anyone, yet is expected to graduate with a class she hasn’t spoken much too.

I won’t be attending most ceremonies, but I really want her to be happy, She probably is, but she needs some memories from this school. Somebody she can say, yeah, I had a good friend in that school.

Not just some person who sat next to me and told me what assignment was due. Spend an entire year texting friends miles away really kills your ability to get attention.

Technology has destroyed the teenager.

Bye Bye Mustache

I ended up shaving yesterday night and I was grateful. I had a difficult time starring at myself in the mirror and how innocent I now seemed.

I remembered what my brother told me, when you have facial hair, majority of the boys would contact you and talk more with you.

If you shave all the facial hair off, more girls will approach you than boys.

I have to agree with his theory. I realizes boys really had more to say because we shared something in common, facial hair, and we had bro talks more than usual.

Today, on the arrival, a girl waved to me. That girl who hasn’t even spoken with me for a while, and another girl later on.

It’s interesting.

Future Makes Me Wonder

In Programming class today I was a bit pleased to see it half empty. This meant little or no lesson at all. That changed though when kids began to arrive from Pep Rally performances for the junior classes.

I’m working on a  project to create my own software; Media Player, Browser, etc just anything to fill in the spot for marks.

The phone rang and the teacher began saying names of people in the row of mine. Funny because the names were given out of order from the office, and here we all were sitting on the same row. One odd ball that was on the other side, but still, what were the odds?

According to one boy on the trip there, he said we’re going because we’re all failing dumasses, He didn’t take pride, just said it in silly way.

On the arrival to the councillor, the teacher instructed us to fill out the information sessions for the university/colleges that’ll be coming in to discuss stuff about their school. I had to make 4 choices, and although my plans aren’t as they want them to be, I made a selection, reasonable ones.

One of them were military, and I was imagining how it’d be to fight in the armed forces, I was afraid because I was weak, and I wondered how the strict orders may damage my personality.

It made me think, a lot.

English Class Discussion

My English teacher went off today from a short story to religious debating. It was so terrible and funny to the point we had to close the door. Now, I’m not going to judge any religion, but the words coming out of his mouth were hard to believe, possibly because it may be true.

He mentioned how virgin marry was given gods seed and in a form it’s rape because it was unexpected. Now, That’s pretty frowning toward people who believe in Christ, a girl was a little offended to be honest.

The lesson was just how a boy sacrificed his life for a girl, and when he did so, the girl who rejected the boy numerous times was able to break the chains which held her to being a good girl. She made her own choices, changed her life and the view of others.

However, it was really a blow to her head when she realized he was gay for another boy, and the night he killed himself, he’d not only visit her home, but the boys as well, both rejecting the offer of being together.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Hero I Want to Be

I was thinking yesterday of how cool it’d be to begin school in Europe. Get enough money hear and covert to pounds in U.K. Get a small, decent apartment and an acting school. I’d be in front of a whole new audience and I’d like to have the new start feel.

Problems here would be telling my family. They’d refuse to let me leave, or think I’m throwing myself around, trying out for things I’ll never succeed with. You never know unless you try. It surely is a big leap, Adjusting would be difficult, but that’s why life is about. Well, a part of life.

I’d return back once I’ve met myself and feel confident and have gotten a good career jump, The joy I’d share with everyone I know. I’d be willing to travel more and support the places in need and go day by day changing lives. Superman died long ago, but if he was still alive, he’d want us to be heroes. We don’t need super powers to save the world, you just need a good heart.

Melting Ice

I spoke with a girl in drama class today about her future plans and current problems. I’ve learned a great amount. I remember back in 8th grade I’d think kids are assholes, ignorant, stubborn and selfish. Maybe they were back then, even I was to think such a way, but now things have changed.

Everyone is stressed, sometimes in tears. They’re afraid more than ever realizing this is it, the final year before we all move on to lead undirected lives. Last time to see each other, the hallways, the lockers, the drama, the teenage years. If my arms were big enough I’d give a hug we all need, a hug I deserve myself.

My plans at the moment are too support as many people I can. Know they have support behind them wherever they go. I want to help them and hope they find themselves after high school. The principle mentioned never to leave anyone behind, especially in after high school. His words hit me because he’s right, nobody wants to be forgotten.

To Marry a Girl

What could be a reason you’d have to marry a girl in grade 12? This question was asked in English today as well and I really had nothing on my page so I was put on the moment. My response sorta went like this.

“Girls in general are really fragile and I’m guessing failing relationships make the vulnerable of self-harm. They’d be seeking for a true love, and it’d be me who’d come for her support. It’d kill me to see her in pain and I’d show her what it really feels to be loved, I’d give away my dreams to save her from breaking apart.”

The class was a bit in awe. As of right now, my love are for my dreams, but if I found love, it’d be a dream come true. It would be nice to have both, but really, those are the two things hard to come by. As of now I work with dreams, if love comes around, I’ll have to see what happens.

Misuse of the Word "Rape"

In English class today we discussed the term “rape” used in unnecessary ways. For example, my school won a basketball game against another school, the players would go on saying “We totally raped that school.” Now, rape means to destroy something if you looked in the dictionary. Although, that would have to be used for example, the companies raped the forest by cutting down the trees. Now when you apply that term against a team, it does coat on more sexually if you know what I mean. I don’t recall if the teacher wanted us to use the term, probably does, but I liked one students response. “It’s sexy when girls say it, wrong when the boys do.” Could be a hidden fantasy, I don’t want to imagine.

Music in Head and Dreams

I woke up this morning to a Bon Iver track playing in my head, “Blindsided” I was brushing my teeth and right away I knew the lyrics by heart. I sang to myself, and I heard the actual song in my head for a long time. I was really tired, and I kept making myself fall asleep. This occurs a lot to me with different songs and it’s interesting, I’d really like to know why it happens. If I were to guess, I’d say the lyrics really get embedded in your head and it connects with the dreams. The dreams connect with life, and present obstacles in an abstract formation where you work to fix the errors. Just my opinion though…

iPhone 4S Better than Blackberry

A lot of people tell Blackberry is better than an Iphone, and others say it the other way around. Me personally drool for the iPhone. It’s way better, especially when you’re in class because the clicking sound when texting is extremely loud. I’ve seen more Blackberry’s being taken away by teacher than iPhone. My close friend has an iPhone and he texts constantly without getting caught. The touch screen works like magic in a classroom. The only thing you’d have to avoid is the light hitting your face during a lecture or powerpoint. With the lights out, teacher will figure it out. You’re either starring at Jesus, or you have a cellphone.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Misfit Powers, (Existing, and my own)

If I was a character in Misfits, the power I’d like Simon’s power, Precognition, because it would be helpful before I place myself in destructive situations. More often I find myself in a trap that I’ve fallen into and I won’t be leaving without struggle and pain. Have the power will allow me to think twice of my actions, therefore, saving me the embarrassment, or even larger, my life.

I remember what I did to prove my trust for a girl once. I promised her I’d pull the fire alarm on Halloween, and I did so. On the good part, I didn’t get caught, on the bad side, she forgot what I’d said so it was pointless. With the power, I could’ve saved my trouble two ways. I could’ve seen if I were to get caught or not, also if she’d remember. However, I need to remember not rely on the power more, I need to go with my gut instincts and hopefully learn from my mistakes.

A power of choice I want would be telepathy because it can help any many situations.

For example, I’m sitting in class and the kid next to me struggles to answer a question the teacher asked. I know the answer, so, I can tell him the answer and let him avoid the embarrassment.

I tend to observe a lot and when I see an incident occur and a conflict rising, I fear approaching the situation, but with telepathy, I can put words In the peoples mind from a distance to settle the fight. (Yes, I’m a hipster because I’m into the whole world peace thing.)

I’m a weird kid in general, I come off an unapproachable person, and I can’t communicate with everyone I see because they walk away from your looks. If I see a girl who is crying about her recent split up, I’d like to be the voice of comfort in her head to make her feel better.

I’d never use a power like telepathy for evil. My work would be too save people from traps of despair and be the assurance everyone needs in life.

Cady Groves is the Sound of Summer.

Way long ago, I believe between 2009-2010 I was a pure volume addict. I’d go on every morning to listen to some new music that interested me, supported artists if I really loved them too.

Cady Groves came up at the home page one day and she’d released her album, “The Life of a Pirate” Her voice really livened up my summer that year, day and night I had her blasting through my headphones. She’s a fantastic singer/songwriter I quickly came to love, and I find that difficult with most Pop artists nowadays. That year, I had this good sensation knowing, this music is a best kept secret, nobody knows about this, and I’d only share it with a true few. My friends loved the album too.

I remember staying up till 5 in the morning listening to her while chatting with my friends. It came to the point all the chirps I heard from birds were in synch with her music, and I knew then this girl would go far.

As of today, she has made amazing progress with her career. She’s getting the attention she deserves, as well responds to her fans at her best. She’s like that girl from high school that is so rad and lives in her world, her ways.

I can’t wait to see her tour across North America, hopefully Vancouver too so I can see her perform live and see her backstage.

Love you Cady!

Insomnia and Graduation Stresses

Waking up can get tiring. I slept at 3 last night doing irrelevant crap and my excuse was I had to work on my grad quote and write up. I wasn’t, I was trying to construct a plan on how to get  a job and leave with the fact I will get the job. My resume has been looking a bit dead so I decided to edit it up, but I didn’t edit much, because someone like me hasn’t much going on.

I usually get depressed thinking of how more teens my age have done more things to go forward, whereas I find asking for volunteer to being a big job. Here I am seeing teenagers fuss about working, get anxious during the interview, and here I am with confidence and motivation that goes to waste.

My friend told me one time that “Maybe you’re meant to do something else in life.” I keep that in mind and it really pushed me forward to believe a better future awaits, that is why, as of today I do little tasks that are filling in the spots I’ll miss growing up.

Songs featured in Misfits Episode 5, Season 3

These are the songs that were played in Misfits season 3 episode 5. Below are track names and description to when they can be heard.

On The Floor - Brandon Flowers
Jen in Kelly's body discovering herself in the bathroom. 

Four Tet - She Just Likes To Fight
Rudy's self-loathing split approaches therapist in her vehicle. 

Anna Calvi - First We Kiss
Seth (Power dealer) gets stood up by Kelly at bar.

Cults - Abducted 
Kelly swapped Jen changing clothes at her boyfriends place.

Goldfrapp - Crystalline Green  
Curtis in his female form wanking in the storage room.

Clare Maguire - This is Not the End
The cast confess their powers to the probation officer during the final moments of his life. 

Cults - You Know What I Mean 
Kelly hugging Seth 

A song I couldn't get a hold of is the one playing at the Bar. Rudy's self-loathing split is taking with Jen about his past. The song is playing faintly in the background. Feel free to comment if you know so I can add that to the list. Thank you. 

Sunday, November 27, 2011

I Need a Job

Tomorrow I’m planning on heading out after school. I have this form and resume with me. The form being 30 hours of volunteer for graduation, and the resume as a note, well, to get the job. I have to leave with confidence, they might do on the spot interview, and I have to be calm, make sure not to fidget a lot with my hands, or give off an uneasy feel. If I succeed, I’m going to ask for a paying part-time job. If it’s even more possible, work there so much I get to be a member of Target staff. Zeller’s have been said to transform into “Target” in the coming years. I heard a lot about Target, I’ve never been to one, but they sell a lot of neat things. In another way, I’m sad that Zellers is disappearing. I remember going their as a kid with my mom. It was a friendly name, especially in the summer and back to school. The commercials were always funny to watch on television. It’s one of those things that can’t be repeated. I believe HBC is now gone too, it was in the news, briefly, No one took it as a big deal, but to me, I was mind blown. HBC, Hudson Bay Company, if someone went back in history to it’s beginnings, it’s tough to grasp the fact it’s gone. What could have I done though, people need to make a living someway.

Anyways, tomorrow I have to be prepared for being asked to come back. Fingers crossed I qualify and I come home a happy camper. I might have to leave Drama though.

High School Changes: People & Me

Kids at my school are unique. I’ve seen them evolve into different people since the beginning. I’d have to leave it to others to judge about me. I remember the girls who I thought were preps, all of them now seem to be desperate for something serious. The jocks have matured to a level where they treat people with respect. Some more than others, the guys with a girlfriend have learned respect from the girl. I find it great to see how much one person can influence someone who I once thought would never change. I’ve seem to become more friends with people I thought I’d never be friends with. I’ve matured with all the changes that have occurred. I find myself to be a stronger person, it’s one of the things I’ll never forget in the future. Here I am, a teenage today, tomorrow I’ll be in my 60’s reflecting when I was a kid. I’ll remember everything I see now, it’s strange to know a change is occurring as I type this post. Life is so strange, Now I feel like giving someone a big hug, I feel like giving everyone a hug, boy, girl, young or old. I appreciate everything in this moment. I can’t imagine how’d it be if I was truly alone, deserted.

family arguments

A lot has been happening at home recently, arguments to be honest. My mom has been ranting on and off, and If I say something, I’m like the light to the fuse, I create this explosion which triggers off other raging thoughts. It comes to the point I’m told to shut up by everyone. I don’t like being told what to do, especially if everyone’s fine with my mom waiting her breath on being angry. No one bothers to try something or change something which pisses me off even more. I really want the best for everyone’s future, I wanna see a day my mom is proud so are the rest. How can I possibly do that when she’s always mad, fighting, and she even puts limits on how free we can be. I have things I’m working on, I have a plan, I know what I’m doing. I can’t explain it to them, because they disagree, the don’t have the same vision as me. Everyone can profit in so many ways if they took the time to listen and see things through my perspective. It’s complete shit just to listen to unnecessary crap. All that energy can be put to good somewhere else, nobody stops and thinks. It always feels like I’m the only one.

Week Outlook (Nov. 28 - Dec. 2)

I don’t usually create a list for what’s ahead for my week, but I’m going to test a theory. I’m going to say, planning out my week will make it go faster than usual. It’s a major fail now I think of it, I’m a spontaneous person, I always end up doing something out of the ordinary.

Monday, November 28, 2011

This day will be okay, My first class will be video production. My guess is my group will be completing a teacher interview. Reviewing  Psychology terms we had over the weekend as well some presentations. Programming will mostly be a new unit, or another day of doing nothing. Finally, English, we’ll be reading a short story.  After school, I need to get around to Zeller’s and handing in my resume to get a part-time job or volunteer.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Day of drama, well, the class, hopefully.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Um… This day seems like nothing, however, something is telling me I’ll expect something different.

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Pep Rally! Woot! And Drama again today.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Looking forward to the weekend. FUN FUN FUN !

Monday’s are always easy to predict, the days after all depend on Monday I guess. Now I have to see if this week goes by fast. It was sure fast writing it out, living it may be a whole different story.

Siberia by Lights: Dream Nostalgic Keys

Earlier last month I purchased my physical copy of “Siberia” by LIGHTS, and I had only heard one song prior to buying, “Everybody Breaks a Glass”, and I automatically told myself, ‘Dude, this is worth it.’ So HMV I went and bought it. I listened to all the tracks and I have to say, I was on the verge of crying. A lot of musicians release music, but the sounds in this album really hit some nostalgic note. It brought me back to being a kid, and I realize this is 2011 now, how I’m growing. Not only that, but music as fresh like LIGHTS is once in a lifetime thing. If I was immortal, I’d spread this album for centuries ahead, her name doesn’t deserve to die. She’s not just a model for stages, she’s not a compact disc, she’s a extraordinary human being. I remember her first EP and her performance on MTV Canada. She stood their singing in her precious voice and I was losing my breath on how delicate it all sounded. You really gain the ability to lose yourself. It’s a blessing to be alive, have ears to hear music, to see beauty, and an imagination of meeting that one person.

The Listening was a hit album, and now Siberia as well. She’s on an amazing run right now, and I’m proud of everything she has accomplished. :)

Tons of homework to do!

My English teacher wants this essay to be complete by tomorrow about this short story called “Miss Brill” I finish so much stuff in that class at different times and different things, he only wants it handed in with everything. I don’t like doing the details, outlines of a paragraph, I write whatever I feel is right. I re-read and believe it’s the most extraordinary text I’ve ever read. I admire my work, but nobody seems to want to bother reading. The whole thing going on, teacher strikes, they haven’t even shown anyone their report cards. They need more money and the government isn’t doing much, our education is being affected. With graduation things going around, I really don’t know what page I am, only students in leadership no most of what has to be done. However, I don’t have them as friends so I’m receiving bits of what is required. I want to sit back this year, I don’t want any parties or anything. Just do my work, and leave. There’s a life ahead of me I rather look at then weep at my wasted, terrible years in high school. I believe I have some Psychology, terms for the “Mental Disorder” unit.

- English: Miss Brill essay, Outline for other essay
- Psychology: Chapter 17 vocabulary
- Drama: Find nutcracker costume

So much to do, I’m so weak at the moment. Ugh.

Graduation Stuff

So, from reading recent tweets and status posts of my peers from high school. The grad quote and write up is due tomorrow. I haven't even put any thought towards what I should write. I'm going to try something dumb smart if you catch my drift. Just to make everyone look like dumbasses, Einstein was good at doing so. In general though, graduation just seems nothing to me.

Miley Cyrus is human

I don’t get it, So what Miley Cyrus smoked weed on her birthday. She’s human, she has a life, she can do whatever she wants. Why do people have to point fingers at her saying it’s wrong for her to smoke weed. I’m not saying drugs are a good thing, what I’m saying is just let people live their life. Quit being so nosy and judging her for little things, it’s up to herself to decide what she wants to do. She admited to being stoned on her birthday, and most people are thinking about the kids who use to listen to her from Disney. If parents thinks she’s a bad influence, they can go watch something else. Humans need to evolve in order to live, someone who stays the same their entire life has never lived. You can never remain stationary, people make choices of how they want to be grown up. Mistakes are made, we learn, and we move on. I support Miley Cyrus, I’ll love her no matter what happens.

Dear, Twilight: Breaking Dawn fans

All the girls at my school have been screaming about Breaking Dawn and it’s quite embarrassing to see them all so giddy for such a movie. There are some stereotypes about Breaking Dawn fans, and I’m not going to say it implies, but look, I’m not going to talk crap about the movie. I love certain actors, musicians, and movies, just don’t rub it in peoples faces by wearing those stupid “Team _____” shirts. It’s just dumb in my opinion, and your character of  a person falls. I don’t go around tweeting billion things about Katy Perry. Control yourself, get a blog and post your admiration for the movie and it’s people. Just don’t decorate yourself into a movie poster. It’s pointless.

Alberta Wind Storm

My friend just called me from Alberta and told me there was a huge wind storm. We had this whole debate on which place gets the strongest winds. I'm from western Canada have realized how a few years ago we had some major wind storms. Alberta wins without a doubt with winds, but her in BC, the rain is a symbol. Alberta gets precipitation more on the cooler side with snow. BC is a mild place like always so when it rains during December it's no surprise. In a way I always believe the rain really makes the small town people depressed.

Eating Healthy!

A silly public service announcement created to educate you on the effects of eating junk.

Try this at Home! :D

This video is crazy fantastic. The person twists the cup and lets the water spin and sit there. Worth the watch! :)

Saturday, November 26, 2011

My Christmas List

Well, I don’t know much about for having the money for Christmas, but I really wanted to put out a list. If I have enough money this year, I really want to purchase the following things.  

-          iPhone 4S - $500.00
-          A new music CD - $40.00
-          New clothes - $500.00
-          New shoes - $200.00

So yeah, pretty much all of that would make my Christmas complete. In total, I need $1240.00.

Where to begin? 


I can recall on a time when I was bullied. It was mostly in early years at primary school when I discovered people, I mean, kids can be cruel. It was recess and it was fall, the sun was cold, the sky was blue. The sand pit was damp, therefore, a lot of the kids had taken advantage to create castles, and what not, and just all the things you can do in sand. I approached a short crowd of kids playing and asked if I could join. I was a shy kid; I had to ask before barging in to avoid conflict. One of the boys said sure, and I was happy. I immediately thought he was going to be my friend then on. While I was using a stick to dig out the sand, two boys through sand in my face, it got in my mouth, in my shirt, and my nose. I was squinting and coughing with my eyes closed, I was going to cry, but I held it in because I didn’t want to create attention. I got up and tried walking away. The boys were laughing; I tried cleaning the sand out of my hair and my face. I spit a lot, I felt sad. For the entire year I sat alone at a bench eating my snack and admiring the sun. Back home, there were problems with my mom and dad with the whole divorce, it was difficult to have the attention of my mom. My sisters had their friends, my brother was young. I felt alone.

It really does carry on into high school. Things from the beginning alter who you are as a person in the present. I was quieter, but I found my own peace to listening to music, reading, and most of all writing. It didn’t talk back, but it all helped. I had a skater phase, and in my high school, kids made fun of me because of it. I was a race more known to be drowned with low hip-hop influence. They believed a specific race had to talk a certain way, talk a certain way, listen to specific music, and wear specific clothes. It came to a point I really felt threatened by these kids, they’d harm anyone. I believed in my religion, and if I had to admit it during religion studies at school, they’d frown saying I’m a disgrace. Once again, I had to change, I tried by polite, I got knocked down, I tried to be myself, and I got knocked down.

As of today, I don’t know who I am. I forgot the things that made me happy, who I was, where I stood. I’m the aftermath of a big bang, space junk, just flying around, waiting for a day I approach a planet with gravity so I can fall and break into a billion pieces, and disappear forever. Life is a struggle, I’m accepting a lot of things, and I never resort to drugs, alcohol thanks to my father. I saw him and how it broke him, and our family apart. I have a life to live, people to love, and a world beneath my feet I still have yet to see. I’m not giving up so fast, I’m too young.

I really admire Lady Gaga; she really brings the issues alive. Many people gains so much attention and seem to forget that in this world are people suffering. She has used her power for good; she’s a hero who isn’t afraid to speak up. I’d like to say thank you, and for as long as I live I’ll never forget your music and the words you spoke. 

War and Happiness

People tell me that war keeps life balanced. Nobody can give the world a piece of peace. Many historic people of the past have attempted to create happiness known, and for those short moments of their lives, we did find peace. Although it’s not eternal, little bits of happiness pauses the pain the world, just the way we wish time over the weekend goes slow so we don’t have to go back to school or work. If I grow up and have enough freedom, I have made myself a promise to change one thing in the world so people can be happy. It really sickens me too see a lot of people being lonely strangers who only live their lives on a poorly constructed road. Anyone can change the world from many different ways. Just recently, I viewed some pictures of men who have burnt themselves during protests just to get a message across. The whole thing about actions speaking louder than words is true. We scream and yell at the top of our lungs so the world hears an issue, but everyone has turned away. However, if you put damage to yourself, or somebody else, the world turns around. I guess back long ago, apes, or monkeys did the same. We crowd around a fight, and we find pleasure in others getting hurt. It’s disgusting how we’ve accepted to grow a specific way. I wish I’m not alone on the passing days wishing for a day when I can walk outside and look more ahead then down on my feet. I know it’s not my fault for what happens in the world, but I am a witness to it all watching the news, we all are, and we don’t do anything. We’re just happy it wasn’t us. 

iPhone 4s or another cellphone?

I'm going to be honest, someone like me doesn't aim for a product from Apple. However, from the creations and the uses of their technology by close friends, I've grown more passion and I now am looking forward into buying my first apple product. Yes, It's true, I have never owned any sort of Apple device in my life. My target is the new iPhone 4S. Now, I am a bit, eh about it because I'm not entirely sure with myself. What really is drawing me into the device is Siri. A well admired speech recognition software which I find convenient. I really like where it's going, I'm truly impressed by that part. I've used my friends and it really does win among other voice recognition software. My friend and I were in a busy coffee shop testing out Siri and despite the noise around us, the iPhone was able to pick out exactly what he'd said. I sat their in shock of how accurate it all is. The design, the feel, just looking at it is too much. I'd like to give cheers to Apple, this Christmas, I wish to have an iPhone in my hands. :)